I woke up this morning, totally not in the mood to do a single thing. Hell, this blog post was a stretch, but still I had to get it moving. I didn't do a host of things I normally do like; wake up early, eat a good breakfast, work out, or meditate. I instead slept late, watched BS TV, and got a Slurpee to overdose on sugar. Once every couple of months, I give myself an excuse to have what I call a "break down" A.K.A , a F@C# it day.
I use it as a reminder of what I do not ever want to become my once normal again. At one time, I participated in that activity often. Once I began feeling like crap, I would go into "blame game" mode. Blaming everybody that ever did me wrong, and instead of taking responsibility for my actions, I would often shift the blame to avoid being the actual culprit, that led myself down a dark rabbit-hole. My F@C# Day stated when I got a late night, very early morning call, that was disturbing and it quickly became my excuse to have my "breakdown day".
I have these days as a reminder also of where I have come from and where I am going. I know I don't want to go back, but as David Goggin, author of Can't Hurt Me, stated, "You don't have to live in Hell, but you have to visit it." This is my day of visitation (Self-Imposed). As I am going through it, reliving demons and ingesting food, that is so bad for me. I know it is so wrong, but it felt so good to do. The consequences be dammed, until the consequences arise. Once I started feeling the effects of my actions (both mentally & physically), I realize why I do not want this feeling back. The benefit of taking the time to immerse myself in the misery is the understanding that I no longer want this to be. It means I must change and reminding me why I must change (the goal is always to find your better-self. I take a F@C# it day once in a blue moon as that reminder of where I do not want yo go. Misery also build you up. It builds strength, character, and mental toughness. An October 20, 2017 article written by Nick Gilbert, on the website, Western Sign and Design LLC, list 6 reasons why Misery is beneficial. The article titled, MY FRIEND MISERY- 6 REASONS WHY MISERY MIGHT ACTUALLY BE A POSITIVE, talked about how positives can come from the negative emotion of misery. below are a list of Gilbert's 6 reasons:
1. Misery Breeds Motivation
2. The misery of wanting should turn into the goal of acquiring.
3. Misery builds relationships
4. Misery teaches compassion
5. Misery makes us stronger
6. Misery teaches
Having the strength to go back, but not be victim of the gravitational pull of your passed. that is the trickiest part, but also the best when you see your misery as the price you must pay to achieve your goal.