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THE MAN WHO SAYS HE CAN VS THE MAN WHO SAYS HE CAN'T

Confucius, was an incredibly intelligent and observant man. My title is a take on his famous quote, "The man who says he can and the man who says he can not are both correct." (Confucius, nd). Ultimately, it is about telling yourself what you can do. We all have some ability to achieve our goals. But attitudes, aptitudes and desires, can either fuel achievement or apprehend goals. Motivational speaker Inky Johnson says, "Perspective drives performance every day of the week ." The way you see yourself and your abilities is probably 90% of your challenge. The other 10%, we choose to focus on because somewhere in the other 90%, it may force us to see things we do not want to see about ourselves and instead, look to blame the difficulty of the 10% as the reason we did not succeed. A PhD scientist, discussed this in his article, Mistakes, Failure, & Blame , he states, "...because it is from this more purposeful, powerful part of the brain that we can both access and apply our wisdom and learning. To do this, we must be willing to change how we interpret mistakes." (Crawford, W. PhD. nd). He then says, “Okay, knowing what I know now, how can I do this differently in the future?" Seeing mistakes as a learning opportunity over a failure, place you, in more of a "can do" mindset.


On the other hand, we can turn our mistakes into blame, and that will clearly place you in a "can't do" state of mind. John Burroughs said, "A man can fail many times, but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else." Some choose to highlight someone else as the reason for failed, success.


I was talking with my younger brother about this concept and we both have the same end goal in mind but different methods to get there. He chooses to highlight some people's inefficiencies, incapabilities and circumstance as reasons why they can not excel in this world.(Frankly, I think he is choosing to blame this "unfair" world for many peoples issues. He is right to a degree, but I have told him about countless successes in this "unfair" world. He see these successful people as exceptions to the rule. I do not. I see them as "can do" attitude people. I tell him if he would not except this of him or his family, why does he grant exception to others. He simply says, "We were raised differently." I say, " we were on welfare and mom was a single mother. "Where was our difference?" He says that Mom's moral fiber and integrity to stay "can do" focused, seeped into us. We learned through omsosissis.


He does not see lack in himself at all (and he doesn't have any he is awesome. I love my little brother. )

because he is an extremely capable and determined person, but gives a pass to others that haven't done the extremely hard work he has. I feel that exempting them to a small degree, grants them exception to the laws (although unfair) of this society. Unfairness and inequality are still no reason to take the "can't do" mentality. Stacey Abrams said this, "Not having is not excuse for not doing" (Abrams, S. 2020).


Keep in mind, "can't do" is probably what you have always thought. This is a perfect opportunity to find your newness of new. Hey, a "can do" mindset is a change. Once you tell yourself you can, you are


HEADING TOWARDS YOUR BETTER LIFE



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